Red Tantra: Sexuality and Attachment

The story of the mystic Rumi with the servant and the donkey

A closer look into Red Tantra through the eyes of sexuality and attachment.

Red Tantra is a personal and spiritual growth path that includes sexual energy.

It is a primordial force with incredible potential! It’s so powerful that it can lead to spiritual realization quickly if channeled upwards. On the other hand, sexuality does carry a strong force within human beings, which can cause them to fall into attachment quickly. Soon becoming slaves of desire.

At the beginning of the journey, women quickly become multiorgasmic. All these energetic practices maximize pleasure and orgasmic power. Men learn to implode pleasure by extending the orgasmic experience to the maximum. An actual ocean of enjoyment is revealed.

Something never experienced before!

It is easy to think only about sex and transforming pleasure into the ultimate goal of the practice, leading Tantra to equal enjoyment. Sexual pleasure and orgasm are the only side effects of this journey, welcoming it to be incredibly pleasant.

This is precisely the real challenge of Red Tantra (the path that includes sexual energy, unlike white Tantra). You have to handle this incredible force without her handling you. She is a mighty tiger, and if you unleash her while maintaining control, she can elevate you to the top at an accelerated pace. 

Tantra is considered a speedy way of realization, so it is suitable for modern humans. (In any case, it must be a gradual path made with a conscience to be a safe way). If the tiger is liberated and you don’t have control, she will eat you. She tears you apart.


Cultivating a spirit of non-attachment to the senses and pleasure is necessary.

Constantly cultivated detachment is an essential aspect of tantric practice. The further one advances, the more it becomes necessary to avoid falling into the trap. For this reason, it has always been considered a ‘dangerous’ path in more religious India. Tantra is a way for warriors, brave and mighty human beings, and virtuous initiates.

This is a serious one ☺.

It is not enough to take a course where you learn to look into each other’s eyes and ‘rub’ in a group, as often happens in the modern new-age tantric settings, or do all the work on the lower chakras to release pleasure, tantric massages, etc.

I’m sorry, but It is not enough to become multi-orgasmic to consider yourself tantric! The one on the genital planes has only reached the first fundamental step. Indeed, it is necessary to liberate sexual energy, freeing your maximum orgasmic potential and learning to remove all obstacles to the free flow of this energy. Therefore, an ocean of pleasure expands the boundaries of your being and opens you to ecstasy.

But just as important as being constantly aware of our desires and impulses regarding pleasure, you will also have to continually check your mind and thoughts so that they remain free from attachment now that you know an unexpected delight.

The next step is even higher: dissolving completely in pleasure until you disappear, until you merge into the One, the source of all things, the Universal principle, the Divine Mother,  the Cosmic Father. In the Whole.


Sexual pleasure becomes an actual portal to the mystical experience. This can only happen by eliminating all traces of attachment to sensual satisfaction—the great paradox of the Red Tantra: the ecstasy of carnal pleasure without attachment to sensual pleasure.

That is still the ego, identified and limited; it can only hinder the expansion of consciousness towards the divine. That is the great challenge: the nectar of divine ecstasy will be your prize if you win it.

If you fall, then yes, it can become devilish. The majestically liberated sexuality, disclosing all its power, can be very dangerous without proper control. Better to leave it alone, better the way of virtue.

From this perspective, I would like to tell you a story of the Sufi mystic Rumi whom a dear friend read to me yesterday, leading me to this reflection.  It might seem shocking; in true Sufi style, but try to grasp its essence, which is so profound.

I’ll summarize it…

Rumi’s words

“A servant had got into the habit of satisfying her sexual desires with a specially trained donkey. She introduced his huge phallus into a pumpkin that served as a ring to prevent his extreme length from tearing her vagina apart.

Her mistress discovered her! She felt entitled to demand what belonged to her and chased away the servant; lustful, she repeated what the servant did with her donkey but without the pumpkin. What happened was very microbus; we all imagine it when the donkey mounted the mistress and what pleasure he received. His vast penis quartered her until her liver was mangled and she died, the head fell to one side, and she fell lifeless ”.

It is a long and detailed four-page story of the ancient text called Mathnawi, which vividly describes images and is strong enough to induce deep reflection. After all, these are the words of the great Rumi, who concludes this story by quoting a passage from the Koran:

“Among the calamities of the Path, nothing is like lust. God the Highest gave a language to the scales. Be careful not to abandon the scales (balance) out of greed and lust, or you will be led to perdition. Don’t be a servant of greed, oh stupid man “.

This warning that Rumi gives us should be a constant reminder for every practitioner of Red Tantra to remain on this path with purity and not use it as an excuse to justify attachments and cravings.


Buddha Samantabhadra thangka

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